AnneOffner.com

Personality 101

You can google just about anything on the internet. I googled “personality” today and found this definition on the Dictionary.com web page: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/personality .[i]

Our personality shows up in everything we say and do. I think of “personality” as the sum total of the traits, characteristics, behaviors, and tendencies that define “who I am.” We know we like some people’s personalities better than others and we know that sometimes our personalities can rub people the wrong way (really, it’s true).

When I was in graduate school I learned that most personality theorists say that our personalities are fairly well developed by the time we are 30 (some say much earlier). More recent research, however, suggests that our personalities can change as we age http://www.apa.org/monitor/julaug03/personality.html

I happen to believe we can change our personalities, if we so choose. For example, as a shy college graduate I had targeted public relations as a potential career for myself. Sounds crazy, a shy person who wants to help promote good causes? Not really. It was just a goal to me. And so my first professional job out of college required me to stand up in front of small groups of people to train and promote a not-for-profit program.  I was terrible at first but later learned some skills from my friends and mentors at the agency. Today I provide training as a regular part of my consulting practice and teach college courses - and the evaluations from my audiences are on high end of the scale. The funny thing about taking on this endeavor was that I went from seeing myself as “shy” to seeing myself as a “teacher” who had knowledge to pass along to others. My personality morphed somewhere around 21-25 years of age. I won’t tell you my age now but I will tell you that I continue to tweak the edges of my personality. That’s part of the fun of life for me - to see what I can take on and how I can jump into the world to gain new experiences.

Now, I’ve certainly met people who like to say “I am what I am” (like Popeye’s famous statement) and that’s ok. We live in a free country and if you like how you are then stick with it.  Whether we want to change our personalities or not we will find that the world changes around us and so how we interact with people and how they perceive us is going to be affected.

That’s when I often step into the picture. When people get promoted, lose their jobs, change jobs, or experience other significant changes in their life, they can benefit from gaining a better understanding of their own personality. I will refrain from selling here on my blog but if you are interested take a look at my website – I have some examples of how I coach people and the kinds of assessments I use in that process: http://www.anneoffner.com/services.htm

By the way, I think personality is a concept that is a helpful guide for understanding ourselves or someone else a little bit better, but personality does not explain everything. We are much more than our personality. For example, the way we show up in the world is also guided by our ethnic background, family upbringing, the types of experiences and education we’ve had, how we like to think (analytically, logically, creatively, intuitively, etc.), what we value, our religious affiliations, and much more.

Being human can be a challenging experience at times. Having a difficult boss or co-worker, getting promoted into a job, searching for a new job, managing the demands of work and family, discovering the type of work that makes it interesting to wake up each day – these are all challenges that relate to personality – our own and how we work with other personalities.

New job - are you ready?

Believe it or not I know quite a few people who have started new jobs in the past few months. I also know a good number of folks who have been downsized and are still looking for a job, but it’s good to see some positive movement in this slow economy. We all react a little differently to the first day on a new job. Most of us probably experience some degree of anxiety or uncertainty about what we’ve just signed up to do. I think it’s often helpful to do some preparation upfront, before you start the job. Below are some ideas.

Take some time before you start the job to unwind from your old job. Maybe you were burnt out or downsized. Perhaps you’ve been promoted or recruited to a new job across the country. Regardless of your reason for leaving, it’s important to find time to reflect on the past before you embrace the future. Think about the skills you learned, the successes you had, the people you appreciated, mistakes you made, and the lessons you learned. Clear your head of any negative feelings you might have. List the strengths you will be bringing to your new job - and the areas you know you’ll need to improve. The point is to acknowledge your past efforts and recognize the transition you’re about to make.

Next, make sure to schedule a few hours, a day, or a week (or more if you’re lucky!) to enjoy a break from the old job. Stay at home and finish a project you’ve wanted to complete. Enjoy the “guilty pleasure” of going to the gym, a yoga class, the mall, or a movie in the middle of a work day! Take a trip. Do some reading. Plan a party to celebrate your new endeavor - tell your friends to bring gifts if you want to - it’s your party!  The point here is to have a little fun, relax, and celebrate “you”. You’ve earned it.

As the “start day” approaches, take some time to picture yourself in the job. Think about the work environment. Will it be different from others you’ve worked in? Picture yourself driving to work. Will the commute be longer or shorter? Prepare for any change in schedule the job will require. Do you anticipate that the new job will require earlier meetings than you’re accustomed to? Will you be able to telecommute? Consider what it will be like to work for the new organization.

If you will be managing a team, put a general plan together for how you’d like to start to work with your staff. Plan to have individual meetings with them to introduce yourself and find out who they are, what their career goals involve, and what projects they’re working on right now. Find out if there are any potential problems they are facing that you need to know about as you step into the first week on the job. Write down questions you’d like to ask your new boss about his or her impressions of your team, their past performance, and his or her future expectations of their efforts.

On “Day One” of the new job, put on a clean, crisp outfit and go off into your new adventure. Take advantage of any new employee orientation or on-boarding program that is offered. It will be helpful for you to quickly get to know the company. An on-boarding program will have some prescribed activities for your first few weeks or months on the job. If your new organization does not offer this type of program, let me know and I’ll try to offer you some tips I’ve learned as I’ve worked with clients to build onboarding programs in their organizations.

Ó Offner and Associates, LLC 2009.  All rights reserved.

Is Openness to Change Fundamental to Success?

I’ve been thinking about the tagline on my website: “Openness to change is fundamental to success.” 

A Wall Street Journal article posted on May 11 by Cari Tuna says that companies are laying people off and at the same time hiring for jobs in other areas they call “growth areas” or “key investment areas”. The folks who are laid off often don’t have the skills the companies need right now and so the companies seek out those who do. Now, we can’t always gain the new-fangled skills our companies might like us to have, but as I’ve said before it’s a good idea to seek out continuous learning opportunities. Here is a link to the article: http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124198904713604533.html

At home people are realizing that old spending habits need to change.  I’ve heard interviews on the radio with people who are raising chickens and growing vegetables in their backyards in order to save on grocery bills.  I’ve noticed my own habits have changed at the grocery store - I watch for sales and often go to three different stores to get everything I need (I can save $1 on natural peanut butter and 20 cents on soymilk at Trader Joe’s!). My exterminator told me during his twice-yearly visit to my house this week that he goes to Shop N Save on Thursdays because if you buy $50 worth of groceries you receive $10 off the total price (apparently this is not every Thursday so if you’re interested, check their ads before you go).

I have friends and colleagues who say they really don’t like change - they like to know what to expect and enjoy predictability. Well, I actually like predictability sometimes, too, but I know it’s harder to find these days. And, my friends and colleagues may not like change but I’ve seen them successfully change jobs, adjust to new bosses, deal with lay-offs and divorces, move around the country, and make a myriad of other life-altering decisions.

Liking change and being willing to participate in it are two different things.

So, I’m sticking with my tag line. Whether we like it or not, change is always around the corner. We may as well do our best to embrace it and learn from it - whether we do so kicking and screaming or skipping off into the sunset and jumping for joy!

Ó Offner and Associates, LLC 2009.  All rights reserved.